Santa, oily fish and kites

Dear Santa,

There are already two windows open on my advent calendar and only 23 sleeps left till Christmas so I thought that I better send you my Christmas list as I don't want another mishap, like the year I forgot to send my list and you gave me a very unwelcome shoe cleaning set! 

I'm sure that you, of all people, will agree that Christmas is getting more and more commercialised and I expect that this has seen an increase in your workload, so I'll make this years list less materialistic than previous years.

First I'd like to point out that I have in fact been very good this year, so do deserve a present. I may have had a couple of minor misdemeanors such as the time I shaved Billy dog, borrowed veg from Mums garden, flashed a fisherman and stole five pence of petrol, but no one was harmed and I've done loads more good things, none of which exactly spring to mind.

So this Christmas I would like:

• I know it's a cliché but the first item on my list is of course world peace, the end of famine and a cure for cancer.
• A self cleaning spray for Billy dog. White dogs might look cute but they're the devil to keep clean.
• To win at least one game over the festive season. My family and I love to play games but are all super competitive, so I'd love to win at least one game, ideally more.
• Some good weather over the holidays. I'm not expecting balmy sunshine but some cold, bright and frosty days would be lovely. A light dusting of snow on Christmas morning would of course be perfect.
• A year of good sleep. I don't always sleep very well so I'd love to get a guaranteed seven hours a night to recharge my batteries.
• I'd like to be able to enjoy tinned oily fish more. I know they are very good for me but just don't like them. I eat tinned tuna but unfortunately it doesn't have the same health benefits as sardines, pilchards or mackerel.
• If you're struggling with any of the above then could I please have a red and blue box kite instead.

I was also wondering if you've got time, if you could answer a couple of questions for me. As someone who works as a Careers Adviser, I was wondering how you got into your line of work? Wish Fulfillment must be a hugely competitive job area to get into and it's always interesting to hear about peoples career journeys so that I can pass accurate information onto the young people that I work with.

So good luck with this busy time of year Santa and please pass on my best wishes to the reindeer and elves.

Thanks in anticipation,

Love Wendy.

P's There's still no mobile signal and dodgy Sat Nav in Porthtowan so you may need to bring your street atlas.